Showing posts with label love story. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love story. Show all posts

Monday, November 11, 2013

Books that changed my life


Is there anything more promising than flipping over the first page of a new book? The rustle of the fresh paper. The smell of the print. The quick peak to the last chapter, and immediate retraction. Re-reading the back flap. Checking out the list of other books by the author. It all holds such promise. Promise of hours of pleasure.

Is there anything more fated than picking up an old book at a second hand store and it becoming one of your favorites? The dog-ears that greet you. The yellow in the pages. The wonder at how many other people would have touched and been touched by the book.

Is there anything more delightful than picking up a random book in the library without knowing anything about the book or the author? And then discovering the sheer joy the book gives you. Recommending it to all those who you know will appreciate it. Buying the book so you have it in your collection after you have returned the library copy.

Is there a more intuitive salesperson than the one who looks at the books in your basket and confidently recommends one that you will love? 

Is there a truer friend than the one who knows the kind of books you like and gifts them to you on your birthday?

Is there a more faithful partner than the one who knows you enough to gift you a book you would never pick up, but will definitely enjoy? 

Is there anything more wonderful than a book that changes your life?

The Fountainhead by Ayn Rand (1943)

I read Fountainhead when I was 16 or 17. When I read it again almost two decades later, I was amazed at the fact that I understood the concepts in the book when I was mere teenager. It's tough to comprehend all the messages in the book even now, but the key ones always stayed with me. And they shaped a lot of my world views in the years to come.

The simplicity of Howard Roark's philosophy about work was what made it profound. It all boiled down to you must love your work. And you must do it with utmost integrity and unmatched passion. No compromises. Too idealistic you ask? Perhaps so. But it's what I have always strived for, even if not always achieved.

It was because of Fountainhead that I got fascinated with Architecture. Being terrible at both math and design, I would never qualify to make it my profession. My secret hope always has been to find a partner who is an architect- just like Roark. Roark even won the title of my Dream Man vying it away other fictitious characters, even as illustrious as Mr. Darcy himself.

Aamir Khan spoke about this same philosophy about choosing a career that you have a passion for in the movie 3 Idiots- which came many years later. Subconsciously I had been following it since I first 'met' Roark. Growing up in the 80s in India, academically bright students like me used to opt for either medicine or engineering. I refused to even consider science as a stream. I opted for Commerce and Economics even though my inclination was towards Art. Guess practicality won over idealism there. For my Masters, when majority clamored towards bank and consultancy roles, I preferred marketing as a career. Highly disappointed that I didn't get a job in marketing, I chose advertising, or rather advertising chose me. And here I still am. I love everything about this industry- the creativity, the passion, the irreverence, the eclectic mix of people. I have learned so much and have gained so many beautiful experiences...but that's a story for another time. Or perhaps a book :)

As it's said "Love your work and you will not need to work a single day of your life". 

Encapsulated beautifully by Ayn Rand in Roark's quote:

“But you see," said Roark quietly, "I have, let’s say, sixty years to live. Most of that time will be spent working. I’ve chosen the work I want to do. If I find no joy in it, then I’m only condemning myself to sixty years of torture. And I can find the joy only if I do my work in the best way possible to me. But the best is a matter of standards—and I set my own standards. I inherit nothing. I stand at the end of no tradition. I may, perhaps, stand at the beginning of one.” 

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen (1813)

How much do I love thee? Let me count the ways. 


I love thee for giving the world a story which became the foundation of almost every

other love story since. I love thee for introducing me to Mr. Darcy. A man who single handedly is responsible for all my romantic illusions, or you could call them delusions. I love thee for glimpses of innocent love in form of Jane and Bingley. I love thee for making me understand the naively and silliness of Lydia when I was her age. But most of all I love thee for bringing Elizabeth Bennett in my life. There has never been a heroine I have felt more connected to. How could a character be written so fabulously that women 200 years later find themselves in her? It is amazing power of words. And magic of Austen.

 

Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett (1989)

A historic fiction book based in the 12th century set against the backdrop of the building of a cathedral. The book explores themes of intrigue and conspiracy against the civil war, religious conflicts, and shifting political loyalties. Architecture is a big part of the story too. See the pattern emerging here? Pillars of the Earth introduced me to the notion of challenging religious dogmas and coming to grips with machiavellian mindsets. Strangely, from the nuns in the story I learnt about the concept of feminism. It's still one of the best plots I have come across. A book I can re-read anytime and still be surprised at the twists and turns. 

Love Story, Oliver's Story by Erich Segal (1970, 1977)
Love Story is one the best love stories ever. Period. There is no debate.

And Erich Segal is one my favorite authors. His every book is a masterpiece- Doctors, Class, Acts of Faith. All my favorites. But Love Story is something else.

The very first line of the book has you hooked. 

What can you say about a twenty-five-year-old girl who died? That she was beautiful and brilliant? That she loved Mozart and Bach? The Beatles? And me?

Yes Jenny dies. You know that at the beginning of the book, so you are well aware that you are going to be crying buckets at the end of it. Jenny was Oliver's soulmate. Polar opposites but meant to be be together. And they were. Until she died. And he had to carry on living in the sequel. The book is a timeless romance. Oliver and Jenny's love formed the cornerstone of my feelings about love. I still believe love like that exists, but only a few lucky ones find it. 

Oliver's story offered me a more grounded reality of love. Mature love. Love which was born out of reality, but was still hopeful.

Whatever romantic illusions Mr. Darcy had set, Oliver Barrett IV cemented. And I have been screwed ever since.

Salmon Fishing in the Yemen by Paul Torday (2007)

Much before Ewan McGregor and Emily Blunt made salmon sexy, I picked up the book from the library after reading a review. I had no idea what to expect. It was the authors first book. So there was no baggage there either. It was a book about salmon fishing. My least favorite fish. And about Yemen. Country I knew nothing about. 


Yet I count it as one of the most delightful stories. Wiki describes it as a "romantic comedy" which is the same genre as "Confessions of a Shopaholic". Seriously!? It is not a story about romance, though romance is a part of the story. It's not a comedy, though the writing is very humorous. It's a book about breaking norms, following your instincts  and never, ever stop believing.

The book came to me at a trying time of my life and showed me that there is always a place for hope. And miracles. You simply need to believe. 

Palace of Illusions by Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni (2009)

Mahabharat is an epic. The story, the characters, the plots, the lessons all have been a big part of my life's philosophy and beliefs. The difference here is that this story was written from the perspective of Drupadi, the principal female character. It bought to forefront the deep male chauvinism that is steeped in Indian society. It questioned the righteousness of some of the male protagonists. It raised doubts on certain age-old beliefs. It sympathized the plight of Drupadi and made readers realize her pain, while the epic always only focused on her anger.

The author took one big liberty with this ancient tale which forms the key foundation of the entire book. This one departure makes you look at the epic rather differently, especially as a woman. Divakaruni uses nuances from the take to scratch beneath the surface, uncover hidden intentions and present them in a new light. What comes out is a fresh perspective and if nothing else at least offers food for thought. 

For me it reinforced my admiration for Drupadi and it made me realize more than ever fighting for your right can never ever be wrong. 

Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand (1957)

I read this other Ayn Rand's magnum opus more than twenty years after The Fountainhead. The book simply cannot be classified into a genre. It's a thriller and there is mystery. It is a science fiction to some effect. It has romance and lots of sex. It's about business and politics. It's about ideologies and philosophy. It educates, it warns. It instills  fear and then hope, or perhaps the other way round. But most importantly it makes you think. It makes you question. 

"So you think that money is the root of all evil?" said Francisco d'Aconia. "Have you ever asked what is the root of money? Money is a tool of exchange, which can't exist unless there are goods produced and men able to produce them. Is money made by the intelligent at the expense of the fools? By the able at the expense of the incompetent? By the ambitious at the expense of the lazy? Money is made – before it can be looted or mooched – made by the effort of every honest man, each to the extent of his ability. But money is only a tool. It will take you wherever you wish, but it will not replace you as the driver. It will give you the means for the satisfaction of your desires, but it will not provide you with desires. Money will not buy intelligence for the fool, or admiration for the coward, or respect for the incompetent".

In simpler terms its not wealth that is bad, but the relationship one has with it. Is it wealth gotten my honest means, or is it looted in some way, shape or form? Is it used to indulge simply in ones hedonistic pleasures or is at least part of if given to the less fortunate? Is it the centre of ones existence and feeds ones constant fears of losing it? Or is it spent selflessly to give joy to others? 

Atlas Shrugged renewed my faith in capitalism. Capitalism not materialism. The two concepts could not be further apart. I have always maintained that inefficiency is a bigger fault than stupidity. Don't blame the smarter, sharper and more intelligent ones who have made more money than inefficient, stupid and ineffectual ones. Each unabashedly deserved what they have received. 



 I wrote this for you by Pleasefindthis (2011)

"I need you to understand something. I wrote this for you. I wrote this for you and only you. Everyone else who reads it, doesn't get it." 

How can you not pick a book that says this? And I spotted the last one on the shelf, and only because I would get a free bag if I spend more money. It was fated. As it's said, a book chooses you. And comes to you at the time you need it most. 

This book is a collection of writings, poems and photographs that showcase a relationship between two people which once was deep and intense, and has since then ceased to exist, but it's effect still lingers. It's about soulmate and lost souls. The words touched my heart like not much has in recent times.

What is most heartening for me is that books have always been a huge part of my life, and will continue to be so. And their power to change my life is never changing. 











Saturday, July 10, 2010

My Top Ten Love Stories

1) Pride and Prejudice- There is no love story as magical, wonderful and real as Lizzy and Darcy's. Has to be first on the list.

2) Qayamat se Qayamat Tak also known as QSQT- my all time favourite Hindi movie. I know, I know...it’s as cliché as cliché can get. But I can’t help myself. I loved Aamir then, and love him now. And I have lost count on how many times I have seen this movie. QSQT is to me what DDLJ is to other girls.

3) Pretty Woman- classic! Who can create magic better than Richard Gere and Julia Roberts? (I absolutely refuse to believe that he is gay as many gossip sites claim). Its also one of the first movies I saw with friends in Eros during Junior College days. Beautiful memories!


4) Maine Pyar Kiya- sigh! Blame it on my age. I was 15! But it has happy memories so I will not watch it now and ruin them. The movie was also responsible for the catch phrase "Dosti ka ek asool hai madam, no sorry, no thank you".

 
5) Ankhiyon Ke Jharokhon Se- loosely based on Erich Segal’s Love Story. (best romantic book ever by the way- even Sonam Kapoor was reading it in ‘I hate luv storys’). It starred Sachin (so cute!) and Ranjeeta (even cuter!) and it had a sad ending, which only made me like it more. And the title song is the one of most romantic songs ever.

6) Saath-Saath- A Farooq Shaikh-Deepti Naval starrer (one of the best on screen couples till date). It gave us one of Jagjit Singh’s best ghazals “tum ko dekha to yeh khayal aaya”. And it showed what happens to love after marriage. A true portrayal of a love story leading to marriage but with miraculously a happy ending.


7) Sleepless in Seattle- Meg Ryan is the rom-com queen and I can watch this movie multiple times over.





9) Only You- Marisa Tomei’s search of her soul mate since she was a child and a fortune teller at a carnival tells her she is destined to marry “Damon Bradley”. Of course as fate should have it she falls in love with a Peter- played by the devilishly handsome Robert Downey Jr. who just pretends to be Damon. What’s in a name? I will take RDJ even if his name was Bhola Prasad (ok may be I would get him to change his name first)

10) Chandni- Most Indian girls would be seriously offended that I did not count DDLJ, Dil to pagal hai, Kuch Kuch hota hai and other “Raj-Simran” type of movies in my top ten. Sorry! SRK just ruins it all for me. But I am a fan of the older Yash Chopra movies. Could not decide between Lamhe and Chandni and settle for the latter as I kinda like love triangles where the girl has to pick between 2 guys. And Sridevi never looked better!

11) Sailaab (the TV series not the movie)- Though I do feel that Madhuri’s item number in Sailaab the movie in a navari “Hum ko... aaj kal hai... intezaar...koi aaye... leke pyaar” is the best item number in the history of Indian cinema. Ok I digress... (And yes I know this is no. 11 and it says “Top 10” but I didn’t think anyone’s counting, and it’s my post, so live with it). Sailaab is the 2nd best TV show ever made in India (first one is Trishna). Sailaab aired in 1997 on Zee and starred Renuka Shahane (Madhuri’s sister from Hum apke hain kaun who dies), Sachin Khedekar (Tabu’s impotent husband from Astitva), Prajakti Deshmukh (who no one except me probably remembers) and Mahesh Thakur (plays cameos in many movies nowadays and was the dad in Shararat). Sailaab demonstrated a sensitive portrayal of love in an extra marital relationship between Shivani (Renuka) and Rohit (Sachin). But it is the Gaytri-Rohit story angle to watch out for. Very poignant and beautiful. A production by Ravi Rai- wish he would give us some more of this.


That’s my top 11 :)


Will end this post with a quote I came across recently and it stuck with me “Someday, someone, will walk into your life and will make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else”. (This, believe it or not, came up in an office meeting and I nearly had tears)


Sunday, July 4, 2010

I love luv storys

Ok, not the most original title, but its topical, no? Though why would you want a movie title with one typo (luv) and one grammatical error (should be ‘stories’ like the plural of story and not ‘storys’), I don’t know. But might as well go with it...


Ok, so I do love ‘luv stroys’. They offer hope, smiles and more stuff to dream about. And am a huge fan of dreams and dreaming. As Mahi (of ‘Mahi Way’ fame) so eloquently put it “Mere dimag mein na har samay ek naya sapna chlata hai- movies ki tarah- woh bhi Technicolor mein”. (My mind is forever seeing dreams like movies or something to that effect).

I am also a Hindi Film movie snob (as my regular readers- all 9 of them- would know, I condone the use of the term Bollywood). I prefer good Hindi cinema, and usually turn up my nose on commercial cinema- but I watch it all the same. Becoz fluff and frills thy name is escapism.

So I naturally went and watched “I hate luv storys”- first day 2nd show! And enjoyed it (more on that later*). But it did make me think about why are love stories so popular? Any film industry all over the world, any soap opera, any TV sitcoms- love stories reign supreme. And even “serious meaningful” movies usually have a love story element. Which I guess is a given, as love is the corner stone of all relationships and finding your soul mate, janam janam ka saathi, companion, partner, love of your life is what everyone desires- whether they admit it or not. So the fact that there is a love angle in most movies, books, soaps, sitcoms, music videos, song albums, etc is nothing to be surprised about.

But the obsession with love stories per se (and the multi-million dollar industry of chick lit and chick flicks- and yes I am a huge contributor to that) does make me ponder sometimes.

Most love stories or rom-coms (romantic comedies for the uninformed) have one of the below story lines:

1) Boy meets girl (or girl meets boys- it’s all about equality), first comes dislike, then friendship, then passion, then love. Remember “Dil- Madhuri-Aamir starrer”?  Or the ever famous “Love Story” (original title that one). The movie which launched Kumar Gaurav.

Side-bar: till date my mom laments on why he could not make it big. Which does beget some thought- as he was one the premier ‘chocolate boys’, had a rich influential dad, well connected in the industry, was talented (remember Naam- brilliant!) and not bad looking. Which does make me believe that luck, fate, destiny have way too much play in our lives. OK- this is much more than any space anyone must have devoted to Kumar Gaurav since he disappeared into oblivion in the early 90’s. So I shall stop.

Bottom line- first “I-can’t-stand-to-see-your-face” dislike to “I-will-give-up-my-life-for-you” love.

What I question: all the things you hated about this person when you first met him, would those qualities not resurface? Or you believe that you can change a person (HA!)

2) Childhood sweethearts: Awww must say this is one of my favourite themes. Remember “Hum Kisise Kum Nahin”? And the sweet “kya hua tera vada” song? Which Tariq (am convinced he was born with a guitar around his neck and has had one in every scene of every movie he ever starred in- all 5 of them) and Kaajal Kiran who used to sing the song to each other as kids and it was the song that bought them together too. So sweet! Other childhood sweetheart love stories are Devdas (Devdas and Paro; though that kinda is more of a tragedy), Parineeta (lovely! Only movie besides Dil Chahta Hai where I liked Saif) and many others that I can’t remember now.

What I question: in today’s fast moving world where you are popular as your last Twitter feed, how can one person continue to be the most important one in your life from childhood till you die? It’s awfully sweet and all that, but won’t you get bored?

3) Bad Boy-Good Girl routine: I can relate to this one most of all. It’s the classic good girl believes she can make the bad boy good. Err “No sweetie (and yes I am taking to myself now), it ain’t gonna happen!” Bad boys don’t turn good just coz they met you and you influenced them. But yes, I like the archetypical ‘bad boy with heart of gold’ and yes, only I can pierce the cold exterior to uncover his nice, caring side. Case in point Kunal Kapoor (he is such a cutie, second place in my heart after Aamir) in Aaje Nachle played the proverbial bad boy transformed because of the good girl Konkana who loved him.

What I question: how do you distinguish between the actual bad boy and the bad boy with the heart of gold? Becoz in 9 cases out of 10, chances are you are with the former

4) Best friends turn lovers: There is something intrinsically beautiful about that fact that the love you were looking for all your life is actually right next to you as your best friend- only you never noticed. My favourite example of that is Barney and Laura from Erich Segal’s epic novel “Doctors”. They grew up as neighbours and best friends, went to med school together, consoled each other through numerous break-ups and f$%$-ups, only to find that they were destined to be together. Ceclie Ahern’s (author of PS I love you book) “Where Rainbows End” is also about 2 best friends Rosie and Alex and the story of how they ultimately get together.

What I question: what if it does not work out? You lose a best friend in the process. That’s sad, no?

5) Rich boy-poor girl; poor boy-rich girl: Needs no explanation. Every Hindi movie ever made in 1970’s and 80’s had this story angle in some way, shape or form. And Hollywood is no stranger to it either. Remember Tom Cruise’s Cocktail? (It even includes the never-gets-old scene of girl’s father trying to buy the boy off). Jeez! Or look at “For love or money” with Michael J Fox or the desi-adaptation “Yes Boss” with SRK and Juhi Chawla. The ‘twist’ here was that both the boy and girl were poor but ambitious and they had to choose between love and money. Any guesses what won? Yes! Love triumphs all! I really liked one dialogue SRK says in Yes Boss “Doh nakamiyamb log ek kamiyab zindagi nahin bana saktein”. (2 unsuccessful people cannot make a successful life). Of course he does go back on his words, and chooses love. But there is a lot of truth in what he said. Bitter truth, but truth all the same.

What I question: Well, there are way too many of them. As this is least believable story line for me. Seriously! An heiress marries a taxi driver  and lives happily ever after?! Really!? (Raja Hindustani with Karisma and Aamir- only Aamir movie I can’t tolerate!)

Ok enough of “Idhar udhar ke baatein, vegera vegera” (my fav line from “I hate luv storys)- let’s get to the point- love stories are:

• Predictable

• Follow a standard pattern

• Are quiet far from reality

• Stretch the truth

• Make false promises

• And worse of all, show us what we are missing in our real lives

So why-oh-why do we still torture ourselves with them?

I think the answer is simple: at heart we all want to believe that magic exists. We sometimes find touches of this magic in our real lives (yes it exists and it happens) but our eyes are blinded with the realities of life- work, kids, school, responsibilities, bills, gym, kitchen, the list goes on, that we miss this magic.

Hence we pay 10$ for a movie ticket and 8$ for the pop corn-coke combo for someone to show us their version of this magic. And for those 2 or 3.5 hours (if its Hum aapke hain kaun), we believe again, we cry for our heart-broken heroine, we laugh with her when she is happy, we look admiringly at our hero and wish we could take him home, we ogle at him shirtless (Imran Khan was looking way too hot without his shirt and gawd! that is way too ‘cougarish’ as he is at least a decade younger than I am, if not more. And any case, I will take his maamu over him any day).

I cannot end without a mention from a Yash Chopra film- as he is the ultimate romance magician after all- "Kahin na Kahin, koi na koi, har ek ke liye bana hai". And it is this belief that keeps us coming back for more...each time..everytime.

* Well, this was supposed to be a review for “I hate luv storys”. But I have spoken too much and about way too many things. So in a nutshell, here goes:

Watch “I hate luv storys” if you love love stories and for

a) Sonam’s winning smile (don’t care what anyone ones, she is tons prettier than Deepika Padukone)

b) Imran’s sense of humor and great bod and just coz he is Aamir’s bhanja and can do no wrong in my eyes (also don’t care what anyone ones, he is tons better than Ranbir Kapoor- though Ranbir is not bad too)

c) The songs- 'Bahara' by Rahat fateh Ali Khan- rules my iPod now

d) The awesome saris Sonam wears in the “Sadka” song. Chiffon sari with a bikini top- start of a trend here!

e) The dig at all Karan Johar movies from “Raj-Simran” at the start, all the way to a beautiful song on the Swiss Alps- oops it’s was New Zealand this time (kudos KJ for being able to laugh at yourself. I like!)

f) The chance to see magic happen once again!



So take your friend, drag your husband, or bring your daughter if she is old enough and smile with Sonam and Imram as they fall in luv.