Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 26, 2014

Looking back at childhood


Nostalgia comes in various forms. Sometimes it's a gradual and lovely stroll down the memory lane. This usually happens when you are pouring over old photo albums, or meeting a childhood friend after awhile or reminiscing growing up with your siblings or cousins.

At other times nostalgia has a fucking weird way of smacking you right out of nowhere. I was sitting by my condo poolside today and saw some little girls play with a skipping rope. I did not realize kids these days still skipped rope. And suddenly I had this gush of memories engulf me. I immediately picked my phone and messaged my closest childhood friend who I have not seen or spoken to in last five years.

And when she said that she misses me and I replied that I think of her very often too, I started tearing up. Now as crying alone by the pool side with an empty glass of wine on the table was simply not an option, I decided to pen my nostalgic thoughts. And of course by 'pen' I mean fly my fingers on the iPad touch screen keyboard.

For God knows what reason we played on the staircase on the third floor of our building. Two of my best friends lived on the 3rd. We each got our toys to the staircase which comprised of tea sets, miniature kitchen utensils, adhoc dolls (we never grew up with gorgeous Barbies and their fancy accessories) and other random stuff like beads, mums old costume jewelry, etc. It was a weird ensemble of toys and knick-knacks, but we knew better than to ask for more. Our parents did not given into our demands as easily as we do nowadays. Yet we were content. Almost blissful.

We rode bikes, they were rusty and most of the time borrowed. We played games like sankli, kho-kho and lagori (which iPad auto corrects to algorithm). I was never the sporty one, but my friend Monika always made sure I was picked in her team so I would not feel left out. We played till the sun went down and the moon came up and our mums yelled from the windows for us to come up for dinner. 

As we grew up we went for walks to the beach or around the building. We sat on the 'tanky' (water tank) and gossiped about everyone who walked by. And when we wanted some privacy we went up to our secret spot on the terrace- by far still one of my most favorite places in the whole wide world.

We ate street food everyday during the holidays- roadside sandwich, bhel puri, dosa with suspicious looking white chutney. But we could never tell our mums that we would skip dinner. 

During summer holidays we went swimming at Juhu gym and ate chicken club sandwich after. We would the leisurely walk back but never go home. We would get end up in another friends house and simply continue playing, chatting, giggling. 

Our parents didn't keep tabs on us. As long as we were home by 8 pm, there were no questions. A minute later and it would be completely a different conversation.

Friends covered each other's back. No matter what. "Yes Aunty, she was with me all the time" was recited in utmost sincerity, even though the friend in question was actually holding hands with the boy from the next building for the past one hour. 

We grew up with one channel on TV and one TV in the house. We learnt to share. 

There was one phone line for the longest time. We learnt to exchange hellos with our parents and siblings friends.

Family dinner meant eating with the family. On the same table. And usually a friend who decided to stay as her mum was not home or just because she fancied mums dahi vadas. We learnt to open our homes to others.

Picnics meant an entourage of 8 or 10 Marutis and Fiats and food enough to feed an army. My favorite picnic food till date is aloo-puri. We learnt to accommodate each other's preferences.

Movies were watched in big groups in front of a small TV. We got chips and Thums up when mums were in a good mood. We learnt to bond over the frivolous. 

Holi meant the whole building would get together and have fun. We learnt to party! 

Diwali meant visiting pretty much every relative alive and each house in the building. We learnt to give our time to others. 

Friends siblings were treated like your siblings, unless they were of the opposite gender, appropriate number of years older and you had a crush on them. We learnt to protect and be protected. 

They were times when rainy season meant paper boats and summer days meant kala ghatta golas. When joys were sought in the little and shared with many. When life was lived in carefree abandon. Where the biggest worry was...well there were no big worries. When laughter filled the air and loved filled the senses. When you cared enough that when decades later you missed your childhood friends, you knew they have been missing you right back! 

It's ironic that we better understand the value of the childhood we've had only when we are older. Because when we were growing up, we never gave a seconds thought to growing old. 

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

I HATE GOODBYES

My worst one was when I was leaving Bombay to come to Singapore. This was over a decade ago but I still remember it vividly. The one specific moment when my friends were discussing plans for the next weekend and I blurted out “But I won’t be there!” And they gave me the look “err yes, you kinda won’t be in the country?” It’s right then that it struck me! Life would go one without me. My friends and cousins would still make plans, go out for movies, meet for drinks, do brunches and generally hang out- only I won’t be there!


It felt awful! I detest Goodbyes (‘detest’ has a more forceful ring to it than ‘hate’)

When I moved to Singapore, I found out that the good-byes never end. Even if you stay put- as I have for 12 years out of which 8 years have been in Tanjong Rhu- others do move. And it does not matter that you are not leaving, you still need to say good-bye.

Last night I had to say another Good-bye- it was one of the toughest ones in Singapore. As I was saying good-bye to not only a fab friend, but a lovely person too. And she has grown to be much more than a friend to not only me, but also to Sanil.

I once read somewhere that God sends people in our life for a SEASON or a REASON. And once that season is over, or that reason is completed, they leave. As their work is now done.

Archana came into my life as both. A season of spring- as I met her right after I had passed through one of the worst and darkest winters of my life. And for a reason- to show me the frivolous and positive side of life again.

Now when I look back, I realize I don’t have to look back too long. I’ve known her only for a year and half. That’s all! But it seems like a lifetime of memories.

Last night when we walked back from a Stadium Waterfront- a walk that we have taken umpteenth times before- its felt just the same. But when it ended and we parted ways, I had to accept. It’s NOT the same! It was our last walk together and we won’t be seeing each other anytime soon.

My eyes welled up and heart was heavy. A person that you are used to seeing at least once a week if not every other day, and you know that you won’t be seeing them for at least many months to come- it hits rather hard! And I had to say it-as much as I detested it- good-bye.

I wish her all the very best. Would I be happier if she were not moving? Yes of course! But I am happy for her? Yes of course too! Archana may you receive all that you seek and happiness be yours now and forever. I shall miss you tons!

A walk down the proverbial memory lane of our good times:


- Watching “Oye Lucky” and being the 2 people who laughed the loudest in the cinema

- Sending back ‘sherbet-like’ cocktails

- But drinking all of the potent ones

- Wine evenings (is this getting too alcohol skewed? Have to list down some others too)

- Chatting about everything from kids to Indian economy, Hinduism to Hindi movies, Kashmir issue to Kareena movies

- The evening walks by the Tanjong Rhu Bay

- The Tuesdays visits to the ‘magic temple’

- The “high” notes followed by jumping in the pool (with clothes on)

- The cake fight

- The Clarke Quay surreal night ;)

- The birthdays, Christmas, Halloween and various other parties in between

I feel blessed to have had you in my life. You ground me, while letting me fly. You let me dream but with a reality check (though I still believe that Farhan Akhtar is perfect for me). And you make it all seem effortless.

Simply put it- You just make life MORE FUNNER!

And not to mention that Sanil has full faith in you protecting me from any “bad guys” out there. Guess I need a new bodyguard now ;)

As I mentioned innumerable times in this post, I hate Good-byes. So I won’t say it. Will say ‘Au Revoir’ instead. Always loved the French term for Good-bye- Au Revoir - which translates as “Until I see you again”.


Love See(mahi)