Wednesday, April 15, 2009

The Hiding Heart

My heart is hiding. It does not want to face this world. Going through motions today, I felt an out-of-body experience. Like the person was not me, but a bleak part of me. While the real me, with the heart, just watched silently.

The real me knew that the other me was doing, what was required to be done, and doing it well. But there was no heart in any of it. Because, as I said, my heart is hiding.

It’s hiding from pain. It’s hiding from the unknown. It’s hiding its tears. It’s hiding its desires. It fears.

My heart is hiding. It does not show itself. When I smile, the smile does not reach my eyes. When I laugh, my laughter seems hollow. But only to me. No one else guesses why my eyes seem lifeless and the laughter soulless. How can anyone know, when I don’t understand it myself.

But what I do know is that I want to tempt my heart to come out of its hiding place. To experience new feelings, to feel new experiences. But it does not listen to me.

I wonder what will tempt my heart to come out and live once again. Till then, my heart is hiding

1 comment:

  1. Take a good rest (your mind i mean), go to a yoga session, try to connected to your heart gently again, but no rush, take all the time you need. New feelings, new experiences will be ready when you are ready. :)